Pygmy by Chuck Palahniuk

""Begins here first account of operative me, agent number 67 on arrival Midwestern American airpot greater _____ area. Flight ______. Date ____. Priority mission top success to complete. Code name: Operation Havoc."

Thus speaks Pygmy, one of a handful of young adults from a totalitarian state sent to the United States, disguised as exchange students, to live with typical American families and blend in, all while planning an unspecified act of massive terrorism. Palahniuk depicts Midwestern life through the eyes of this thoroughly indoctrinated little killer, who hates us with a passion, in this cunning double-edged satire of an American xenophobia that might, in fact, be completely justified. For Pygmy and his fellow operatives are cooking up something big, something awful, that will bring this dumb country and its fat dumb inhabitants to their knees."

It pains me to say this, but Pygmy by Chuck Palahniuk is my least favorite Palahniuk novel (thus far). I never met a Palahniuk novel I didn't like until I opened Pygmy. I thought I actually did like it. The writing style reminded me of the way Annyong from Arrested Development speaks. I found that funny and it helped set the tone of the book. I also liked the names of the "kill moves" Pygmy aka operative Number 67 said during his inner monologues. For example he'd say: "pow-pow, Giant Stork Death Kick, collapse inside of pig dog (number 67's name for his host brother) zygomatic arch (cheekbone), driving bone back direct to spear brain, jab-bloom, dead before make stink breath." He'd say stuff like that in his head imagining ways to kill the people around him. Number 67 doesn't like any Americans. He's on a mission from his country to destroy America.

Then I finished the 'Dispatch Second' aka the second chapter of Pygmy and I had to take a break. The second chapter is super graphic and not what I expected from Mr. Palahniuk. He's written stuff like that before, but the nature of this time did not sit well with me. I couldn't believe what I had just read. At first I didn't really follow it, but certain words gave me clues of what was going on and then I got it. Maybe I was being a little too sensitive about the situation, but I just can't get over that. I will forget it in time, but I just can't believe it. I think that I might've liked Pygmy better if what happened in chapter two didn't get constantly referenced in all the other chapters. I don't think it was relevant to mention more than three times. Sure it played a role in the "twist", but it got mentioned way more times than necessary.

It took me forever to finish Pygmy, mostly because I put it down for two weeks. The plot of Pygmy has such potential and I could tell when it was supposed to be funny, but it was in bad taste for me. I really couldn't wrap my head around the comedy after the second chapter. It sucks because I'm judging the rest of the book based on what happened nineteen pages in, in a two hundred and forty one page novel.  But que sera, sera.

I found it kind of hard to follow Pygmy as well. At first I liked the style of writing, but then I read a whole chapter and I totally missed everything that happened. I only realized I did because they were talking about it in the next chapter.

The end of Pygmy was also so mediocre. Not at all in the style of Chuck Palahniuk. I was really disappointed. I had high hopes for Pygmy and I got shot down so hard.

For the first time ever, I'm not recommending a Palahniuk novel. But if you want to read it to know what I'm so disgusted over, go ahead. Don't say I didn't warn you.